I just finished chewing one of my tennis balls to pieces. It was lots of fun, cracking the squishy stuff up and then tugging at the fuzz. That is, until Allison took it from me. She says blue fuzz isn't good for my "digestion." When I whimpered in confusion, she muttered, "If you eat the ball, you'll get a tummy ache! Chew, don't eat!"
Okayokayokay. So no more eating fuzz. I looked up at her with my best puppy eyes. Allison gave me the ball back (repeating that I was not to EAT it), and then she and Rachel read some poems to me. I settled down to chomp and listen. The first poem was called "The Tummy Beast."
"The Tummy Beast" is one of several poems in Roald Dahl's book Dirty Beasts, illustrated by Quentin Blake. It starts, "One afternoon I said to mummy,/'Who is this person in my tummy?'" From there, the pudgy human-pup tries to convince his mama that there is a beast inside him that makes him do bad things like "raid the biscuit tin." When this funny poem reaches its most exciting part, the tummy beast makes sure it gets heard! Awooo! I loved it! My tummy growls for Milkbones a lot, so I know how the pup feels!
The rest of the poems in this book talk about other naughty animals, including a crocodile who eats human-pups with mustard and a winged cow who gets stinky revenge on a bullying grown-up human. The beasts are very dirty and on the hungry side (littler human-pups might not like the poem about the crocodile...that was funny and scary at once), but in general the poems are silly fun. The pictures of the scraggly humans and jaggedly-toothed beasts made the poems come even more alive! Ruff! Two paws up. Best to read aloud (Allison does different things with her voice to make me jump!) with human-pups PreK-3.
*Also recommended: Roald Dahl's Revolting Rhymes.
Just remember that snuggles and laughs are great for growling away scary beasts of all kinds! Woof! (And silly faces and books and family!)
Here's another hurricane poem for you (Allison and I wrote it to laugh at the storm instead of being scared or mad without the lights):
"They say that some wauzers are shy
But Sam? Oh, he'd always say 'Hi!'
He padded up to Irene
And said, 'Ruff! How you been?'
That mad storm nearly blew him sky-high!"
I really did go out to see that Irene lady-storm. Allison took me out for a quick bathroom trip, even though I hate to get wet. The wind stirred all the leaves around my paws and the branches looked like they wanted to bite my tail off! Luckily, I didn't blow away. And I have a great story to tell my new friends at the dog park (especially Daisy the beagle and Marty the pug, puppies like me!).
Anyway, I got so into the first Dirty Beast poems that I forgot not to rip at my ball's fuzzy stuff. Allison took it away - for my own good, she said - and Rachel picked a few poems out from another book to distract me. Awoooo! I go wolfish at night, but maybe Shel Silverstein can tame me?
We only read some of the poems in Where the Sidewalk Ends, but I already have a favorite. There's one about a human-pup getting eaten by a boa constrictor (a big, BIG snake). Sounds scary, but it's funny because the little boy is writing the poem as he's getting swallowed! Yipe! There's also a good one about a boy who loses his head (I don't think I would lose mine, but I'll make sure to have Allison help me find it if I do...need it to sniff and EAT!). Oh! And another about a double-tailed dog! From what my humans and I have read, there is plenty of silliness in this book - in poems both long and short - to satisfy human-pups' need for laughter and imagination. This one makes a pup like me want to write some more poems, myself, arooooo! Two paws up, and best for GR 3-6. Again, read them aloud and have fun acting out the wacky stories within the poems!
Boa constrictors and dirty beasts aside, I think I should go to sleep before my humans decide I need a bath. I'm getting to be quite a dirty beast myself with all the scampering around with Jacob and playing rough-wrestle-run in the mud at the dog park. Maybe if I act ferocious they won't feel like filling up the tub...
Your very own Dirty Beast Reader,
Sam I Am
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